Our son is growing fast, although he lost some weight the last months thanks to all the illness he had to go through. But I am sure he will get it back soon since he has found his appetite again. At the three year checkup the other day, we saw that he is well above the average size of a three-year-old here in Japan, and looking at his classmates at the kindergarten it is easy to believe. He also is rapidly getting used to more advanced forms of communications and has incorporated and started to use all the tricks I use on him, to make me fit with his wishes. It sometimes makes me laugh when I can hear my own words being used towards me by my son when we are having differences of opinion. And he has started to negotiate with me to get what he wants.
When we have been sick and my wife has tried to work from a room upstairs while my son and I have been playing downstairs, my son and I have tried to be as quiet as possible when mum has had meetings or phone calls. My son has heard me time and again whisper shhh, let’s try to play quietly now. I must say he has been very cooperative and we have usually managed to keep the volume down. Lately, the tables have turned though. When I ask him something that he does not want to hear or do, he interrupts me and says shhh pappa, mamma is working. And it makes me smile every time.
Another trick he has started to use is time negotiations. When I want us do do something now, like tidy up or look for a missing sock, my son says that we can do it tomorrow. We can look for it tomorrow. We save it for tomorrow pappa. But he has even taken it one step further. He is not reluctant to try new foods, and he is not spitting out things he does not like but try to finish his bite. When it comes to finish what is on his plate however, he is very determined not to eat what he does not approve of. But instead of saying that he will not eat it or just simply throw it on the floor, he looks at me and says: pappa, let’s save it for tomorrow.
He is only three and already a master of negotiations. My focus now is to make my son agree that today’s tomorrow, is actually tomorrow’s today when the things we postpone will be done. Son, we will do it tomorrow can not be used to postpone things out of existence, I want to say when he tomorrow as well says that we have agreed to wash his hair tomorrow. I have to step up my game if I am not to be completely outsmarted by him by the time he starts school.
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